Should You Post That?

Your aunt just texted you the most adorable clip of your 2-year-old cousin. He’s squealing with delight as the family dog squeaks a toy. It’s pretty much the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. You’re about to share it on Instagram, but then—

Wait. Is this OK to post? He’s a toddler. He can’t exactly give you permission. 

This sort of social media dilemma is increasingly common, but that doesn’t make it any less tricky. The fact is, it can be tough to know when it’s OK to post, share, like, and comment. But don’t worry! Here are a few simple, expert-approved tips to help you navigate digital life.

This is one of the most important rules of social media etiquette. Sure, that picture of your friend killing her drum solo is sweet, but that doesn’t mean she wants it out there for the world to see. “Put yourself in their shoes,” advises Christine Elgersma, from Common Sense Media. “Maybe they won’t think that picture is funny or cute.” Get in the habit of asking permission, even if you’re the one who took the photo or video. 

Think of an adult you respect and admire. Maybe it’s your grandmother or a teacher or neighbor. Would you want that person to see what you’re posting? If the answer is no, it’s probably a good idea not to share. 

Anything can be made public at any time. Even a private group chat isn’t guaranteed to stay private. Why? Anyone can take a screenshot and share it. 

A picture from your day volunteering at the park? Doing a perfect backflip? Winning a chess match? There is nothing wrong with celebrating your good deeds and accomplishments online. You should be proud of yourself ! But keep in mind that constantly talking about how awesome you are can seem like bragging. It’s all about balance and humility. Ask yourself: What are the benefits of sharing your proud moments with tons of people versus a small group?

Online drama has a way of spilling into other areas of life. “If you post something and it turns out maybe not to be the best choice, there can be an impact on personal relationships—friends feeling left out, offended, embarrassed, betrayed—and also on your school community,” says Elgersma. In your digital life, opt for kindness and compassion. 

Posting your baking hack for the perfect pie crust? Sharing a clever meme you made? Linking to a fascinating article? Those can all be helpful, amusing, and inspiring to others. Constantly posting every teeny detail of your day or disclosing really personal stuff that is better shared with a close friend or family member? Not so much. 

Future employers and colleges often search social media when considering applicants. If someone googles you, what will they see? Think about the kind of person you want to be. Then make sure your digital footprint reflects your values. 

When you’re skimming your feeds and your fingers are flying over your screen, it’s easy to make in-the-moment choices without thinking. So wait 30 seconds before you post. Ask yourself, Why am I posting this? Who will see it? Do I need permission? Is it true? Is it positive, meaningful, or important? Thirty seconds will feel like a long time, but it will be worth it. 

^{This article was originally published in the April 2022 issue.}